Two hours before the first presidential debate, I tried to educate my daughters on what the event was about. President Obama and Governor Romney would answer questions from a moderator, but essentially, they would argue with each other for 90 minutes. Here are the finer points of our discussion:
Ella, my fourth grader, thought the men should just be friends.
Sophia, who’s 6, disagreed. “I would love to see them argue and yell at each other!” she said, and punctuated her comment by the type of screaming she presumed would ensue in the battle.
Ella then changed her tune. “Maybe they’ll start wrestling!” she yelled. When I told her that would be unlikely, she agreed. “Yeah, they’ll be in their business suits.”
After a good laugh, I wondered if parents should engage their young children in discussions about politics. If the answer is yes, what’s the best way to do it?
Love it or hate it, politics affects us all. From the economy to social issues to foreign policy, we put our faith in the hands of our elected leaders, with the hope that they will represent our interests. We don’t always agree with what they say or do, but we’re free to voice our opinions.
Adults have the benefits of life experience and developed brains, and are capable of making informed voting decisions. Children are different. Until they are able to process and comprehend complex information, their worldview depends mostly on what their parents tell them. This can be dangerous if we display heavily biased behavior.
Gleaning truth from political discussions, which is thick with nuance and insinuations, is elusive enough for adults. We’d all rather not have to sift through the mounds of rhetoric to get to the point. Nevertheless, the security of an authoritative word provides comfort, more for children than adults.
It’s hard to provide both sides of every issue. We all take sides, leaving parents with the difficult task of imparting neutrality. The problem is that without filters, we risk shaping how our children think before they can do it themselves.
Ella and Sophia know how Tanya and I lean politically; we don’t keep it a secret. We also want them to know that both candidates are, at heart, good people with the best intentions. And just because they look mad at each other during the debate, doesn’t mean they are enemies. Democracy isn’t always pretty.
As we see in every election, promises rarely turn into reality. But the essence of politics, I’m learning, is not about who’s right, but rather who most people think is right. It’s human nature to identify with a common opinion, and to savor the hope derived from it. Whatever political party my children choose to support in the future, I want them to experience that feeling.
Ella watched five minutes of the debate, a flurry of complaints, interruptions, petulance and semi-truths. “Pretty boring, right?” I asked her.
She nodded and went to bed, probably as satisfied as most adults who were watching.
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