Wee Wisdom: Race Toward Understanding

A couple of weeks ago, a friend suggested Tanya and I watch the movie “42: The Jackie Robinson Story” with our kids.

I was not sure about having my 7- and 10-year-olds hear the nasty things Robinson had to endure as the first black Major League Baseball player, regardless of how genuine the portrayal. So Tanya and I decided to watch it ourselves. And after seeing the ugliness of those who resisted the eventual Dodger hall of famer’s integration, I’m happy with our decision. Even I was uncomfortable.

A few days later, on the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington, I watched Martin Luther King Jr.’s legendary speech over breakfast with Sophia and Ella. Naturally, my daughters asked me about the event and why I was so interested in it.

I informed them that Dr. King was a great man because of how hard he championed for equality. As recently as 50 years ago, I explained, people of color weren’t allowed to use the same bathrooms or drink from the same water fountains or play on the same sports fields as white people. Dr. King helped change that.

Normally, I base this column on something my kids have said, but on that morning, the absurd notion of inequality was apparently enough to transport my daughters into a rare moment of speechlessness. Their silence spoke volumes.

I thought about how important it is to make our children understand the shameful realities of our not-so-distant past, to ensure these injustices cease to happen forever. But the education itself can be painful. How could I teach my kids about humanity’s painful history of bigotry?

I shiver when I hear the N-word or other examples of senseless vitriol. Maybe it’s because I understand context, or that I’m just overly sensitive. But if certain words and attitudes can make a 39-year-old cringe, I worry what they’ll do to my untainted kids.

Still, the only way to sidestep ignorance and hatred is by education. And I can’t help my kids if I pretend that discrimination arises from words alone. The root causes of oppression take time to develop, but can be hard to squash once they’re ingrained. Tanya likes to say that words only have as much power as we give to them. Maybe if my kids are disgusted like I am upon hearing hateful speech, then their aversions to it will be cemented early. Their path to whatever greatness for which they’re destined might start right then and there.

About 12 minutes into Dr. King’s rousing oratory, he started talking about his dreams. “This is important,” I said, leaning into the computer screen. "Let's listen."

Ella weaseled her way onto my lap. Sophia had already left the table, but I sensed her listening from the top of the stairs.

…I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character…

I’m glad those are the words they heard.