Last week, Ella downloaded a song from itunes called "Run This Town," by Lucy Hale. It came from the soundtrack of a movie called A Cinderella Story: Once Upon A Song—a kids movie—which is going to make what comes next sound a bit bizarre.
While we were eating dinner, we heard a lyric that said, "kissing your ass isn't what lipstick is for." For the record, Tanya and I don't seek out songs with inappropriate lyrics, but as all parents who have ever listened to music know, this kind of stuff happens. We roll with it.
Without breaking stride from chewing her dinner, Sophia said, "She said a bad word." She might as well have said, "Pass the salt," or "I played tag at recess."
I was impressed with Sophia's nonchalance regarding differentiating between an event to avoid at all costs, and a tiny blip of impropriety. She will surely need to know how to manage such situations throughout her life, and I want her to be able to succeed.
Ella was a bit more amused. "Kissing your ass isn't what lipstick is for! Hah!" she exclaimed with a smile.
They both looked at me, waiting for a response. I stayed quiet and kept eating.
"Ass isn't a bad word, it means donkey," Sophia said. "Maybe she meant donkey. Like, 'put on lipstick to kiss your donkey,'" She pointed across the table to a vague spot in the kitchen. "Right Dad? It's like, 'Hey, I see an ass! Kiss it!"
I thought it was pretty funny to hear my 7- and 9-year-old daughters say the word "ass" over and over again, though I'm probably somewhat evil for it. We had a good laugh for a while, and once another song came on they seemed to forget all about what had happened a few minutes earlier.
Making light of such situations is not unusual in our house. And the more we do it, the more I realize how harmless it is. What's the big deal about blurting out a few grown up words every once in a while? My kids hear me say "shit" or "fuck" if I spill something or break a glass. They cover their mouths in disbelief—Dad cursed!—and we move on. I remember as a kid hearing my parents doing the same things. It's not exactly child abuse if they hear this stuff; they might as well get a bit desensitized to it before the teenage years roll around.
My wife likes to say that words only have as much power as we give them. I agree. And besides, it makes randomly uttered curse words sound pretty goddamn, motherfuckin' funny.
I try to refer to them as "grown up words" instead of bad words since most grown ups I know say them (usually not around my kids, mind you.).
ReplyDeleteThat being said, I was less than thrilled to hear by almost 3 year say "dammit. dammit. dammit." when he spilled his yogurt. I'm blaming that one on my hubby.
yeah, right...always blame the hubby!
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